Body image and eating disorders are Something close to home for me that honestly nearly ruined my life!
If I could take anything back in my life it would be those emotional, depressing years of letting my eating disorder control my whole entire life! Letting myself get so ill that I ended up in ICU for two weeks and hospital for months! I wasn’t allowed to walk and lost all my strength! I refused to eat and was very picky in the Little foods I did eat!
My hair fell out, my organs shut down, I pushed my friends away and told everyone to just leave me alone! My friends and family where so worried But I couldn’t see what they where all worrying about!
You can’t take back the past so it’s only made me a stronger person today and given me so many life lessons!
For me It all started slowly with a negative body image, wanting to look a little fitter, ‘eat clean’ and feel better about myself and a few years later I ended up with a eating disorder with out realising it!
All my friends and family could see it but I was so blind and stubborn I chose not to believe anything they said!
I’m a strong believer in raising awareness for illnesses like this and depression.
The people close to me will know how much this affected me about 5-7 years ago! But it didn’t only effect me it also effected them!
I honestly never thought I would have got to a point where I let myself eat what I feel like, where I can nourish my body, listen to it, where I can take time away from the gym or decide to just go for a casual walk instead of doing a long sweaty workout without getting bad anxiety.
The hardest part is telling your mind that it will be worth it! I promise you that recovery is worth it, you might not recover in 6 months or a year but if you admit to having a problem and start recovery now imagine how much healthier and happier you will be in a few years time! My recovery was slow and I certainly had a few step backs and started slipping back to old ways again but as soon as I noticed I made sure that I stayed focused because I had come to far to just let it all go! For me to recover I had to have a lifestyle change, I moved from Tasmania to the Gold Coast to start seeing a phycologist, change my bad habits and look for a new healthy positive lifestyle! This also lead me to a new career and a wonderful loving hubby!
Choose recovery! You are worth it!