The first time I’ve felt like telling my story

I am a 46 year old woman. I am married and have two beautiful, amazing children aged 18 and 15.
I have been a Registered Nurse for 23 years and work at our local hospital. My husband is also a Registered Nurse – we work at the same hospital!
I developed bulimia at the age of approximately 23 years of age. It’s hard to tell exactly when it started and I didn’t really understand what was happening at first. I remember looking up bulimia in a medical dictionary one day and was distraught when I realised this is what I had.
I eventually I told my boyfriend (now husband) about it – he was a great support and continued to love me and we actually married right in the midst of my illness.
Throughout the years I saw three GP’s, one dietitian and three different psychologists…none of them really helped. They were all lovely and caring but probably not skilled in the area of eating disorders, I know they all wanted to help but didn’t know how….I felt so isolated, ashamed and alone. There were times where I would be “well” – especially during pregnancies and breast feeding but it wasn’t until I turned 40 that I’d had enough and one day decided that I didn’t want bulimia to be part of my life – I was sick of the shameful secret I was carrying and I didn’t want my children having a bulimic Mum. So I stopped.
Life is so much better for me now, I wish I had of been able to recover a lot earlier and hate that I spent a lot of that time really, really unwell. It was also so exhausting keeping it a secret from the rest of the world.
I’m so grateful that it is behind me now….this is the first time I’ve felt like telling my story – it feels good.