I want to be free
Hi, my name is Emilia and this is my story.
Two years ago I started having control issues, and felt like I needed to have control over something, which unfortunately ended up being food. Slowly things just became out of hand and it was getting hard to manage.
In the past year I’ve been inpatient several times, under the mental health act. I was trapped. There was no freedom. I could be anywhere and still feel suffocated by the demons. It was like being in prison and I hated it so much.
In my last admission I wrote a lot, and a word that cropped up most was ‘freedom’. I needed freedom. I needed to set the demons free, set myself free, and live again. It’s so difficult, but we’re all brave. We’re all strong. Let our faith be stronger than our fear. Slowly but surely, I am becoming more free every day, and it’s amazing.
Recovery was the scariest thing I’ve ever done, but it was the only thing that would save me and give me freedom. It won’t be easy, but it’ll be worth it. Because the secret to happiness is freedom, and the secret to freedom is courage.